How Reflective Listening Can Motivate Teams and Inspire Trust

Last week, I was banging my head against the wall trying to figure out the topic for this month’s newsletter. Frustrated, I said, “I’m stuck. Nothing feels right.” He looked at me, nodded, and said: “I hear you’re feeling stuck and nothing feels right.”

…Great. Thanks for that groundbreaking insight.

All joking aside, I’ve spent the last few months teaching Leading with Empathy workshops for restaurant leaders (including my husband). It’s been just as much a learning experience for me as for them. The focus? Technically, it’s about empathy, but practically, it’s about active listening. Not just nodding along and waiting for your turn to talk, but really listening.

I teach the skill of reflective listening, and then we practice it in groups. This means reflecting back what we hear, labeling emotions, and course-correcting when we’ve gone awry (“No, I’m not frustrated; I’m angry!”). One thing I’ve learned in my work is that listening is the clearest…